Nike made mention at a stockholders meeting this morning that they are increasing their sales projections by 12.2% in the month of April and 11.4% in May after discovering an underlying trend of increased sales ahead of rave events in Sydney. The increase in sales is predominantly expected to come from increased shoe sales with a smaller portion coming from active wear and jacket sales. Nike shares were up 3.2% today on the back of this announcement.
This statistical phenomenon was discovered after charting past sales spikes and identifying that they have coincided with major events such as Defqon.1, Supremacy and Knockout Circus which has a historical precedence looking back at the data over the last several years. Nike has a bright new intern to thank for this discovery who has since been hired full time in their market research department.
We reached out to the intern to ask how they made such a groundbreaking analytical discovery to which they have officially replied
“Aww, too easy bruh. Fresh kicks gets the chicks. Fresh clothes gets the hoes.”
